Forget what’s considered normal, comfortable, safe….I don’t want it. I want teeth-gripping passion, unending curiosity, a grand and wild adventure. An everlasting love affair with life itself. I want that fist clenching, nails digging into your back kinda’ love, where a single moment lasts an eternity and nothing at all at the same time. Where every cell in my body is alive, just dancing with joy for this very breath. Passion is my blood, coursing through my veins like a raging river, full of that primal essence of life itself. 
My emotions, delicious like a beautiful fragrance, arise organically when the flower is in full bloom. Sometimes smelling sweet and inviting, and other times just a tad bit bitter. Today I might feel like it’s time to play, and tomorrow to retreat. And that’s okay. It’s a part of my nature. Just like the ebb and flow of the ocean rises and falls, so do my moods, my energy, my emotions. I am human after all. I just want to feel. I want to feel the wind atop the highest mountain peak to play with my hair, and to let the moonlight dance upon my bare skin. I want to swim with the mermaids, and to giggle with the fairies in the forest. I want the ecstasy, the joy, the radiant bliss. Where my cheeks hurt for smiling so much for no damn reason at all, other than the fact that I am alive! I want it real. I want it raw. I just want LIFE…and I absolutely will not settle for anything less! ;)

this reminds me of san marcos

flowersofgaia:

Reiki love

(Source: wearetheweavers)

Life in San Marcos is magical, synchronistic, high vibed, and absolutely amazing. Have been taking in SO much light from the higher dimensions, but like with all things- the stronger & brighter the light gets the stronger the shadows do as well. As we are open to receive this divine light into our being, we also open ourselves up to the shadows of our past hurts, pains, and fears. Usually these will be represented as old patterns, feelings, and situations that are being brought to light through different people, places, or circumstances in our current reality. We can consciously choose to work through our feelings, to truly feel the feelings without defining them as us. Instead of pushing them away and playing out our old control dramas we have the option to let them go. These feelings may make you feel like your going crazy, but your not. FEEL them, but don’t associate them as YOU. What you are feeling IS real, but the feelings are not YOURS. When you recognize this, you can say “Okay, I’m feeling angry right now” instead of “I AM angry right now”. As my teacher told me this morning, we are in a process of ascension (which we CHOSE to go through before we came into this life) and part of that decision came with agreeing to go THROUGH and work through things, not just skip over them or deny their existence. Maybe what this process is all about is being open and receptive to the light and the dark, and being able to accept and love them both at the same time. Now that I can see what I have been holding on to, the density is coming up and I’m able to release the resistance to let it go—-if I choose. Recognizing our patterns, feeling them, and choosing to release them is a truly ONE of a kind, liberating experience. It’s amazing, freeing, opening and sooo organically beautiful. Moral of the story: learn to feel what you’re feeling, without attaching to that emotion. The feelings are REAL but they are not who you are. You are light, source, eternal bliss. If you can let go into the feelings, without identifying with them you will be able to let them go and release. It’s part of the process of uniting with Oneness; the Yin/Yang, Divine feminine and masculine, god/ goddess. Our light and dark come hand in hand.

Just let it go & let it flow :)))

(Source: recoveryisbeautiful)

Last night I had a dream that I pulled an oracle card, titled : home. I’m not sure of the details of the rest of the dream, but the boldly titled card that read HOME, stuck with me. For the past month I have been living, growing, working, sharing, and co-creating with a beautiful group of individuals at The Mystical Yoga farm in Lake Atitlan, Guatemala. I originally planned to stay here anywhere from 1 to 3 months, but, my intuition and the energies around me have been hinting that it is time to move on. “Where will I move on to”, “where will I go?” and “what will happen when I do” are some of the recurring thoughts that have been running through my mind.

 At this point in time, my home is changing, merging, and becoming something completely different than I’ve ever experienced. Most people link the meaning of home to the childhood place where they grew up. My concept of home has been, and is in the process of evolving. I realize that home is not a place outside of me, rather it is a state of being that I possess and can access at any time, a place that resides within rather than without. Now, the task at hand is to access this place of home within, so I may travel, journey, and explore while still feeling at home within myself and the world around me. I don’t know the exact details of what lies before me, but I have faith that there is a divine plan ahead of me, and a beautiful, synchronistic route that will lead me along my true destiny path. It might not always be easy, but I know it will be worth it in the end….

Spiritual Journey

living in Guatemala is like a dream. SO unbelievably beautiful. I’m sooooo beyond grateful (and still slightly in shock) that my dreams are finally manifesting in physical reality. LOVE LOVE LOVE life :))))

This evening I found myself outside under the stars wading barefoot ankle deep in the pool. I sat down poolside and splashed my feet around in the water. There is something I find so nurturing and rejuvenating about being in, near, or around a body of water that makes me feel right at home. Surrounded by large overgrown trees and flowers I took in the beauty of the moment.

 I thought about my day, and the plans or expectations I had about meeting a teacher, healer, and friend that had fallen through. My teacher had been teaching me one-on-one about tantra, the path of sacred sexuality. Although tantra is the union of two beings through the physical, emotional, spiritual, and energetic bodies, it has brought me into a deeper connection with myself. As if through loving another, it has ignited this growing spark to love and honor the divine within me.

So on this beautiful evening, I found myself all alone under the stars, without a lover, friends, or any set agenda to distract me from me. Poolside, I laid down a towel over the bare earth, stripped down out of my clothing, and lit some sage in ritual as I breathed in it’s cleansing effects. As I waved the glowing sage around my naked body I relaxed into the moment and felt at peace with myself and the world around me. Sitting on my knees in prayer position, I began moving my body around in slight circular motions, drawing my life force energy in and upward through my chakras towards my heart. I placed my hands on both of my power centers, breathing, as I let go and allowed an energy greater than myself to flow through my being. My hands and body began pulsating in orgasmic waves, as the energy rippled throughout my body. Grinning from ear to ear I was just floating in the bliss and beauty of the moment.

 I realized that I don’t need anything or anyone outside of me in order to attain this magnetic, powerful, divine state of being.  I can have just as much fun playing with the life-giving force of the universe, solo, as I can with a partner. I truly am my own beloved, and the love I generate within myself can (and will) only be intensified when I eventually make the conscious decision to unite with another. They say that we can only love another as much as we love ourselves. So although connecting with a partner can be a beautiful union, maybe the real lesson is in loving and celebrating the beauty and divinity with ourselves first. As we rejoice in love for ourselves we simultaneously open ourselves up to loving another. Once we have created this sacred space in honor of the divine, precious, powerful beings that we are, then what could be more beautiful than two whole and complete beings coming together in love, to intensify, unite, and share the God & Goddess energies they embody. It is the sacred dance of the masculine & feminine, the yin & yang, and is the true balancing act of the universe.  

I discovered an immense power I hold within myself, and a deeper love for the powerful being that I am. As I open up to this transformative energy I feel myself growing, evolving, and stepping into the power of the Goddess I know I am destined to be. I give many thanks and gratitude to my teacher, for seeing in me something that I could not see in myself….and for teaching me even when he’s not physically teaching me. 

Lots of Love & Blessings. In Lak’ech Ala K’in <3

“First and foremost, live your light. Live that light inside of yourself with courage. Don’t live in the closet—live it. Speak what you know without getting on a soapbox and waving your hands around like a fanatic. Simply state, ‘This is what I believe. this is what I live.’”

“…When you are in service to yourself and committed to personally evolving and changing, you uplift everyone around you. That is service. Service is not going around martyring yourself and saying, ‘Im going to save you.’ Service is doing the work yourself and living in such a way that everyone you touch is affected by your journey.”

(Source: leadme2thecross1)

At the core of my being, I are just that. My essence is a pure soul. I realize that I am a soul having a human experience, and that whatever I encounter in the outer world is a result of my inner landscape. I can and do create my reality every second of the day. The things I think, speak, and do are constantly creating and re-creating my future. 

I have decided that it is time to leave behind my old fear-based mentality and bare my soul to the world. I will be using this blog more as a journal, and I will be documenting and sharing my spiritual, physical, and emotional experiences along this way. 

I am about to embark on a real life journey to Guatemala. I will be an apprentice at the mystical yoga farm, where I will be immersed in the beautiful spiritual community there. I will be studying yoga, meditation, TRUE eco-friendly living, permaculture, and so much more. 

Oh yeah, and one little tiny detail…there’s no electricity there! So goodbye blow dryer & straightener, and hellOoOo frizzy hair days! :) haha

I know it will be an AMAZING experience, but I really have no idea what to expect. Right now my stomach is churning with a mixture of feelings. From feeling so excited to anxious, nervous, a bit scared (I guess stepping out of your comfort zone is always scary). I see this as a major stepping stone for me. Once I’ve taken the first baby leap, the future jumps (to who knows where) wont be so scary anymore. I want to create a life that is one big, beautiful, love filled adventure…so here’s to the first step! 

It’s about to get really REAL. No more waiting around for life to happen. Time to live the life of my dreams and love every second of it! LETS GO :)))

sandysouls:

Which Is Why I Cant Choose Just One Passion

As a child I felt myself to be alone, and I am still, because I know things and must hint at things which others apparently know nothing of, and for the most part do not want to know.

(Source: misswallflower)